Writer speaks to (anyone)

If you kiss me, I will lose it.
- Now why is that?
Because this is unacceptable. You can't just come here, make me think you're wonderful, then run off with someone else!
- Who says I'm running off with anyone?
You! you did! It's in your eyes, your jaw. Your skin radiates "I'm going to leave you for someone half your age when you're old and enfeebled."
- How does one project that, exactly?
Don't question it.
- Well, that's helpful. What if I wanted to turn that off?
You can't, it's subconscious. It's who you are. You are a narcissist.
- Are you in love with me as much as I'm in love with me?
Shut up.
- No but seriously... If I'm so obsessed with myself, why are you here?
Are you questioning my ability to tolerate your rampant self-absorption?
- Yes.
I know you are terrible for me. I am doing this to myself with full knowledge of the inevitable.
- You should probably know that telling someone about all the terrible things they have not yet done is not the recommended way to begin a relationship.
Oh, it's already over.
- Making comments like that is also not on the list of "things one says to inspire confidence".
Must I inspire you?
- It's part of the gig, yes.
It is a tiresome one.
- You say that as if we've been married 20 years and I have "stolen your best years".
I've already written this story. I'm just waiting for the page to turn.


(This is a snippet of the bits and pieces I have floating around.)